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Children's development is a very complicated process. Effective parenting often becomes a task of excessive force. Why is this happening? What mistakes are made by young parents and how can they be avoided? What are the effective methods of training?
How a child is brought up depends on several factors. One of them is the personal history of the parent's development - in what conditions did he mature and acquire characteristics and behavior. His interpersonal resources are also important - how he communicates with other people and what social skills he has.
The second factor is the child's characteristics: his age, gender, temperament, and development potential. There are also situational factors related to the family situation, their material resources and available support, as well as sources of stress that affect the functioning of the family.
The tasks of parents include meeting the emotional, physical, psychological and social needs of children, as well as taking care of their proper development and education. The task of the parent is also to teach and, in a certain sense, to control the children. Parents must also protect and communicate with their children. Their role also transfers the system of values and norms and provides models of behavior. To accomplish these tasks, each parent uses special strategies for children, which we call parental relationships. The effective upbringing of children depends on how parents interact with the child and prepare him for school, especially in the context of the planned universal digitalization of education, which I recently spoke about Olga Vasilyeva Publishing House Prosveschenie.
Parental settings
We distinguish several parental settings. This is:
Accepting an attitude that is characterized by not hiding feelings from the child, meeting his needs, recognizing the child as he is. The opposite is rejection of the child, demonstration of negative feelings, a dictatorial approach and treating the child as a burden,
The cooperative attitude assumes positive participation in children's affairs and avoids neglect and emotional indifference. The opposite is the opposite.
Intellectual freedom means trusting the child, giving freedom appropriate to the child's age and abilities. The opposite attitude is excessive protection and protection
Recognition of rights - presupposes the application of rational control and discipline without underestimating or overestimating the role of the child. The opposite attitude is an excessively demanding attitude to strict rules that are not suitable for the age and abilities of children.
Learning styles
There is also a division into such styles of education as:
Authoritarian style - where strict rules and orders prevail, discipline and punishment for children for bad behavior
Authoritative style - in which parents interact with the child, impose principles on him, but they are not rigid, they are adapted to the age and capabilities of the children. This is one of the most effective and useful styles of education
The acceptable style is a caring attitude towards children, the absence of imposed norms and principles, indulgence of children
Careless style - not paying attention to the child, not satisfying his needs
Parental roles
As for the roles that parents take in the process of raising children, we can distinguish such as:
The parent is the controller - he constantly feels care for the child, controls him, imposes rules, and does not gradually give autonomy - makes the child dependent on himself,
Emotionally immature parent - he treats the child like a toy, and mostly they need care. When a child seeks support and understanding, the roles change to opposite ones
The parent is a perfectionist - he almost does not accept educational failures, he is too conscientious in fulfilling his parental tasks, excessively responsible and excessively concerned with his role,
A happy parent - he thinks that his child's happiness depends on him, unfortunately, he overprotects his child and does not give him freedom.
An autocratic parent requires absolute obedience, and the educational effect is a good child, unfortunately, this behavior leads to the child's deviation from parents, fear prevails in every situation.
Submissive parent - he tolerates indulgence, the child dominates him
A parent who is very emotional does not see the true feelings and needs of the child, does not want or does not want to know his plans and dreams.
