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A close person is called a close person for a reason. This name contains the basic and fundamental condition of the relationship: to be close, share living space, hold hands, take turns bringing bread and kefir to the house. Or maybe this understanding of intimacy is vulgarity, middle-classness and atavism? After all, real, high relationships are the kinship of souls, not socks and underpants. And then it is not at all necessary to live in the same apartment or even in the same country. How close should a loved one be in the XNUMXst century?
All these chats, video calls, likes and comments make it possible to love each other from different parts of the world. Today's people spend so much time online that it is even logical to have relationships there. After all, now, on specialized sites, they can even teach how to find out who a person likesso that you can fully share the interests of your beloved. However, the statistics are contradictory. On the one hand, she says that 90% of couples break up if they do not get together within two or three years. Secondly, the same statistics show that about 75% of couples went through a long-distance relationship at one time or another in their lives.
Relationships at a distance have a lot of wonderful bonuses: the romance of train stations, incredible emotions when meeting, passionate, long-awaited sex. Such couples sometimes swear, so they don't want to make complaints and express dissatisfaction when meeting, but it's difficult on the phone. But if this is not done completely, then the pile of small misunderstandings will grow to such a size that it will be easier to cut it all off to the damn mother than to untangle it.
Loss of non-verbal communication is one of the most common pitfalls of long-distance relationships. And there is only one way out - to discuss the problems. Of course, compromise is found in personal communication. Sometimes people do not admit that they are wrong, but a look that, alas, cannot be conveyed in a telephone conversation will speak for them.
Therefore, in order to achieve understanding at a distance, it is necessary to learn to replace facial expressions and gestures with words, to verbalize one's states. You should always voice your own feelings. This, of course, will not replace a hug, but will build a solid bridge between partners based on trust, mutual understanding and sincerity.
The second pitfall of long-distance relationships is the lack of life. After all, relationships without dirty linen are beautiful, like in the movies. But love, alas, does not hold well on pink snot - it needs a stable, reliable glue in the form of routine, everyday life, scandals and insults. A strong relationship is when fire, water and copper pipes passed together. But in correspondence it is very difficult to pass some kind of water and pipes together... If people are far from each other, then everyone goes through their own fire alone. And even shoulder to shoulder with another person who happened to be nearby. When the neighbors flooded, you need to take the cat to the veterinary clinic or even just go to the cinema after a hard day at work - in any of these situations, you need a living person nearby. And this person turns out to be, for example, a nice neighbor. And the mutual benefit glues tightly. And after the act of help, one becomes attached because he feels gratitude, the other because he invested his time and energy. And, as you know, sometimes an emotional connection on the other side sometimes hurts worse than physical betrayal. There is only one way out - to work for rapprochement ourselves. Do not be afraid to stress each other with requests for help. Even in your real meetings, allocate time for domestic heroism: move the closet, sew buttons, etc. At a distance, it is possible to help each other in small tasks: to find the necessary information, to remind about a visit to the doctor, this is also very close.
