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For many, living together is a serious step in a relationship, only equal to a wedding. Life coach Kali Rogers partly agrees: she noted that most often people rush to get together as soon as possible, which leads to problems over trifles. Sometimes lovers cannot divide responsibilities between themselves, sometimes they do not get along because of personal space, sometimes it turns out that the newlyweds have no idea how to manage a budget. We'll figure out what you need to make sure of if you and your boyfriend want to become even closer.
You and your boyfriend understand who likes what.
Little things that seem imperceptible at first can eventually become irritating, especially six months or a year after starting a life together: usually, it is at this moment that a stormy love affair is replaced by a sober look at your partner's habits. A guy can be annoyed by cosmetics left near his computer desk, just as you might be annoyed by a towel left unhung after taking a shower.
One of you loves to cuddle up in bed with your dog, the other would rather take your pet far away. According to Chris Armstrong, founder of Maze of Love, these are all important things to consider if you and your partner decide to move in together.
Make sure that you won't have to fight with your boyfriend when you move in with him. To do this, go out together more often, or even stay at each other's house for a week or two: this will help you determine how different your daily habits are.
You know how to keep track of money.
New York City-based relationship expert April Mazzini says that people often tend to hide expenses or lie about their income—the truth is revealed too late, when the couple is already struggling financially. Before you move in, make sure you're able to talk honestly and openly about the financial aspects of your relationship. You have the right to split the budget or combine it, but make sure that each of you contributes to living together.
You understand that living together is more convenient.
Although this is not the main reason, it is also important. When it seems that it is many times more convenient to take and leave things with your partner than to constantly drag yourself across the city with a bag full of cosmetics and towels, when you are sure that you are almost never at home, when you are tired of paying bills for a place where you spend one night a month - this is a sign that you and your boyfriend are ready to live under the same roof on a permanent basis.
You think realistically.
Yes, it’s great to think that life with a partner is endless cozy evenings with cocoa for two and hot nights. However, the reality is different: sometimes it will be difficult for you to get used to the habits of another person, sometimes all the strength and desire to create a romantic atmosphere may disappear - and that’s normal. If you and your partner are able to talk about difficulties, you will be able to avoid conflicts and mismatches in expectations.
You can spend time alone.
If you can't live without each other for even a minute, there is a risk of codependency, which erases all boundaries between you. In order not to lose mutual interest in each other, dating coach Karenna Alexander advises sometimes doing things separately from each other: be sure to maintain enthusiasm for those hobbies that only you like, meet friends, learn new things separately. The ability to live your own life will ignite the sparks of your relationship for many years to come.
At the same time, you know when it's worth being close to each other.
Relationship coach Ravid Youssef says that a good couple is one where partners who live together understand when it's time to rekindle the good old romance. Going to see your parents or friends is fine, but nothing beats an evening spent alone with each other. Before you go out, make sure you and your partner respect your personal boundaries while still paying attention to your significant other.
You are capable of solving problems.
Moving in with a partner means dealing with unexpected challenges. For example, Bustle reviewers Christina Felizar and Lea Rose Emery noted that they had to deal with the water heater turning off seven times when they first started living together. They didn't get mad at each other — all thanks to their ability to listen to their partner and solve the problem together.
Family therapist Pella Weissman agrees: in her opinion, people who live together experience not the most pleasant moments day after day, but if they are ready to work together for their common well-being, the effect of adversity will not be noticeable.
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For many, living together is a serious step in a relationship, only equal to a wedding. Life coach Kali Rogers partly agrees: she noted that most often people rush to get together as soon as possible, which leads to problems over trifles. Sometimes lovers cannot divide responsibilities between themselves, sometimes they do not get along because of personal space, sometimes it turns out that the newlyweds have no idea how to manage a budget. We'll figure out what you need to make sure of if you and your boyfriend want to become even closer.
You and your boyfriend understand who likes what.
Little things that seem imperceptible at first can eventually become irritating, especially six months or a year after starting a life together: usually, it is at this moment that a stormy love affair is replaced by a sober look at your partner's habits. A guy can be annoyed by cosmetics left near his computer desk, just as you might be annoyed by a towel left unhung after taking a shower.
One of you loves to cuddle up in bed with your dog, the other would rather take your pet far away. According to Chris Armstrong, founder of Maze of Love, these are all important things to consider if you and your partner decide to move in together.
Make sure that you won't have to fight with your boyfriend when you move in with him. To do this, go out together more often, or even stay at each other's house for a week or two: this will help you determine how different your daily habits are.
You know how to keep track of money.
New York City-based relationship expert April Mazzini says that people often tend to hide expenses or lie about their income—the truth is revealed too late, when the couple is already struggling financially. Before you move in, make sure you're able to talk honestly and openly about the financial aspects of your relationship. You have the right to split the budget or combine it, but make sure that each of you contributes to living together.
You understand that living together is more convenient.
Although this is not the main reason, it is also important. When it seems that it is many times more convenient to take and leave things with your partner than to constantly drag yourself across the city with a bag full of cosmetics and towels, when you are sure that you are almost never at home, when you are tired of paying bills for a place where you spend one night a month - this is a sign that you and your boyfriend are ready to live under the same roof on a permanent basis.
You think realistically.
Yes, it’s great to think that life with a partner is endless cozy evenings with cocoa for two and hot nights. However, the reality is different: sometimes it will be difficult for you to get used to the habits of another person, sometimes all the strength and desire to create a romantic atmosphere may disappear - and that’s normal. If you and your partner are able to talk about difficulties, you will be able to avoid conflicts and mismatches in expectations.
You can spend time alone.
If you can't live without each other for even a minute, there is a risk of codependency, which erases all boundaries between you. In order not to lose mutual interest in each other, dating coach Karenna Alexander advises sometimes doing things separately from each other: be sure to maintain enthusiasm for those hobbies that only you like, meet friends, learn new things separately. The ability to live your own life will ignite the sparks of your relationship for many years to come.
At the same time, you know when it's worth being close to each other.
Relationship coach Ravid Youssef says that a good couple is one where partners who live together understand when it's time to rekindle the good old romance. Going to see your parents or friends is fine, but nothing beats an evening spent alone with each other. Before you go out, make sure you and your partner respect your personal boundaries while still paying attention to your significant other.
You are capable of solving problems.
Moving in with a partner means dealing with unexpected challenges. For example, Bustle reviewers Christina Felizar and Lea Rose Emery noted that they had to deal with the water heater turning off seven times when they first started living together. They didn't get mad at each other — all thanks to their ability to listen to their partner and solve the problem together.
Family therapist Pella Weissman agrees: in her opinion, people who live together experience not the most pleasant moments day after day, but if they are ready to work together for their common well-being, the effect of adversity will not be noticeable.
