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Betrayal in a relationship is always a pain that penetrates to the very depths of the heart. It becomes a difficult test that forces you to make difficult and fateful decisions.
Betrayal is a test that can destroy a relationship, but it can also be a starting point for a new, deeper intimacy. This is what a psychologist told us Ludmila ChernovaThe main thing is your feelings, honesty, and willingness to change.
Decisions after betrayal
Every person faced with this challenge faces a choice:
- to divorce
- to stay together
- to go away for a while to think things over
Each of these paths depends on many factors that affect our emotional state and willingness to move forward.
What influences the decision?
Each person makes decisions based on their own experiences and life circumstances. Among the most common factors:
- emotional state
- self-esteem
- fear of loneliness
- fear of financial difficulties
- presence of children
- Attitudes acquired in childhood (e.g., "tolerate for the sake of family")
- other individual circumstances
However, no matter how difficult the decision is, it is important to make it with a cool head and always through an open dialogue with your partner.
A frank conversation is a step towards clarity
It's important not to avoid talking about the betrayal. Even if it's difficult, you need to talk about everything that happened. Honesty will allow you to better understand the reasons for the situation and perhaps find a common path forward.
The psychologist said that for 20 years she has listened to the life stories of different people. It is striking how differently they react to the same situations: everyone has their own emotions, thoughts, doubts, and decisions.
The result you want to get
The most important question to ask yourself is: “What do I want?” It is important to consider your desires, feelings, and personal goals. Remember, where you are now is the result of decisions you have made in the past.
To find the right path, ask yourself:
- What am I feeling right now?
- Am I a happy person?
- How will I feel if I take this step? And what if I don't?
Answering these questions will help you better understand yourself and your true desires. It's your life and only you can decide who will be a part of it. Stories are different, but your sense of happiness should be the center of attention.
History from practice
Cheating almost always leads to a breakup of a relationship. However, there are exceptions. Once, an expert was approached by a couple who had been cheating on each other but wanted to restore their relationship.
The reason for the betrayal was that after the birth of the child, the woman devoted a lot of time to the baby and the man felt abandoned. In return, he did not care about his wife and they became distant emotionally and physically. This led to the appearance of lovers in each.
However, when trouble struck the family, the woman's lover refused to help. At the same time, her husband, the child's father, returned to support her. They discussed their mistakes, forgave each other, and decided to start over. Over the course of a year, they worked on their relationship, letting go of the past, and finding harmony in their life together.
