Why do women strive to change their image after a divorce from their lover?

19.01.2025/11/40 XNUMX:XNUMX    247


Why do women strive to change their image after a divorce from their lover?

Not only music and film stars, who are closely followed by tabloid photographers, but also ordinary people, after breaking up with a loved one, strive to change themselves and their lives. And this, first of all, is a psychological salvation from an oppressive problem.

"Let him be jealous"

The first reason why girls change their image after their beloved man leaves them is a firm intention to prove to him and to themselves that he has lost something valuable. And if before they didn't have enough money to visit a beautician, now they spend their last money on beauty treatments.

Psychologists claim that the desire to achieve the heights of the desired image contains an important potential for an internal growth strategy, which allows us to make what we wish for come true.

After all, girls who have changed externally also become more self-confident internally. At first, they simply want to demonstrate their “new selves” to their former lover, but over time this desire is increasingly leveled. Gradually, ladies begin to notice that other, no less attractive, men are paying attention to them. Compliments from strangers, admiration from girlfriends and their own understanding of achieving effective results increasingly overshadow memories of the ex and his last offensive statements. And then, in the life of a renewed beauty, usually, the next lover appears and all thoughts are concentrated around the romance that has broken out. A change of image is often a catalyst for a new love.

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"My revenge is terrible"

Another, no less common reason why people who have been abandoned by their loved ones change themselves is the desire to take revenge. This happens to both men and women. One famous American athlete once told reporters that she became a master of sports in fencing precisely because she dreamed of challenging her ex to a duel and stabbing him. However, constant training changed not only the appearance of this girl, but also her entire future life. From an ordinary chubby student with glasses, she turned into a professional athlete, began flying to competitions in different countries and completely forgot about her revenge on her husband when he left her at the most difficult moment of her life.




But it also happens that the desire for revenge changes a person for the worse. Usually, nondescript young men who have been dumped by a beautiful woman dream of becoming "macho" and taking revenge on the girl, and in such a way as to harm her appearance. There are many stories about how an ordinary, quiet man suddenly turned into a terrible criminal personality. The desire to seem cool and daring with an admixture of the thirst for revenge on a former lover often pushes a person to commit a crime - kidnapping a woman or deliberately causing harm to her health and appearance. And then - either prison, or living at large among the most hardened criminal elements.

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Psychologists believe that the best thing a person prone to love revenge can do is to become happy in a different life, one that follows different rules and has completely different habits.

"This is not me"

Much less often, after a failed personal relationship, a person seeks to completely change himself along with his image in order to hide behind a new personality. Usually, this happens to people who are self-confident, self-sufficient, but who have come under the serious influence of their significant other. And then, when their beloved leaves their life, an emptiness appears in it. The abandoned individual suddenly acutely realizes that he is nothing, there is nothing valuable and attractive in him, although he always considered himself just that; talented and charming. It happens that such a psychological breakdown leads to a suicide attempt, but most often unsuccessful. And then, the once strong and independent person, who now feels worthless, begins to recover, while gradually creating his image anew.

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Psychologists explain the close connection between such concepts as "self-concept" and "self-image." Having imagined the end result of his own change, the individual builds a chain of actions for himself, thanks to which, as he believes, he should regain his former abilities and self-confidence.

And it is at this moment that not only a radical change in appearance occurs, when everything is used, including plastic surgery. The person's environment, sphere of activity, lifestyle and place of residence also change. Transforming himself, such an individual suddenly breaks ties with old friends, quits a prestigious job, becomes a vegetarian or joins a religious sect, permanently moves to another city or even to a distant country. And only by making this external and necessarily internal "rebirth", forcing himself to forget his former love and life, does such a person achieve some harmony with himself.

That's why people usually try to change their image after a breakup. It psychologically helps them start living anew and find love again.


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