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Many people absolutely do not attach any importance to this skill, and therefore do not notice problems in communication. Let's figure out why you need to actively develop your ability to listen and hear the interlocutor. And in what ways it can be achieved.
Situation No. 1 — Imagine yourself in the place of the interlocutor
The problem is that you do not understand exactly what your interlocutor is talking about, and you do not know how to support the conversation.
Solution - ask the interlocutor more questions, clarify what, how and why he did. The following questions will be good: "How did you come to this?", "Why did you decide to do this?", "How did you feel in this situation?".
In order to better understand your conversation partner, try to put yourself in his place. Anticipate what he would like to say and try to ask leading questions of that nature. By imagining yourself in this situation, you will be able to better understand the interlocutor, ask relevant questions and make the impression of an intelligent listener. And, what is important, an interesting interlocutor.
Situation #2 — Change the situation
The problem is that you don't remember what you hear, and it's hard for you to listen to other people's speeches.
The solution is to try to change the situation constantly, every 20 minutes try to switch your attention.
Why 20 minutes? Because the attention cycle is exactly 20 minutes. Then your concentration becomes a little dull, and the brain cannot "collect" to receive information with the same success. How exactly to change the situation? Ask questions, write something down, try to distract yourself for 2-3 minutes and analyze all the previously received information, etc. d. If you are in a lecture, you can try to Google images or terms on the topic. Such a life hack is good because you switch and do not distract attention on something else. But at the same time, you train the ability to listen and hear, not sacrificing information, but only better immersing yourself in the topic.
Situation No. 3 — Try to remember names or events better
The problem is that you communicate with the interlocutor, but you lose the thread of what is happening and do not know how to continue the conversation if it has reached a dead end.
Solution - remember names, interests or events.
How does this method work? First, by remembering a person's name, you will always be able to contact him without problems, even in the case of a hopeless situation. This will subliminally melt the ice between you and make you feel sympathy. Secondly, having well remembered who this person is and what he does, you will be able to come up with new topics for conversation on your own. And it's also easy to discuss what interests you.
Situation #4 - Don't tell, just listen
The problem is that during communication, the illusion is created that you are "on topic", but as a result, you do not get anything out of the communication.
The solution is to try to talk less and listen more.
Let others express themselves, and you will see a breakthrough in communication. Here, again, a tale of two ends. On the one hand, you allow a person to express himself, to share what is in his heart, to calm down with the help of such therapy. Thus, you will place the interlocutor towards you. And a person will not even notice that, in fact, only he is speaking. And secondly, this way you will be able to absorb the necessary information. After all, your interlocutor will tell you everything and even more. Believe me, at the end of the conversation, you will remember much more of the necessary information than usual, when you tried to keep the conversation unobtrusive. Your ability to actively listen and hear a person will play into your hand.
Situation #5 - Watch the little things
The problem is that you communicate and everything seems simple and clear. However, in the end it turns out that you did not fully understand the hints, looked silly or naive.
The solution is to listen with your eyes, observe and follow a person's behavior, facial expressions and emotions.
Sometimes emotions, facial expressions and gestures can say much more about a person than words. Pay attention to the intonation with which your interlocutor speaks. He looks you in the eye, how he gestures and what emotions he feels. Of course, it will be difficult for a person who understands absolutely nothing about this to assess the behavior of his friend the first time. However, with experience you will distinguish even the little things. And you will immediately understand what your interlocutor is “made of”.
We hope that our tips will help you develop your listening and hearing skills. The most important thing is that the problem affects absolutely everyone: from the communication of two girlfriends to the conclusion of an agreement between business partners. Everywhere and always, these skills will be useful, because they will help you hear exactly what you need, understand people better, get closer to them and, of course, find those who are really close to you in spirit.